21 things to do if you’re feeling sad

kim kardashian crying2

1 – Dance around your room in just your pants to a proper cheesy 90’s playlist. Crank up the Spice Girls, blast S Club 7 and Mmmmbop all over your bed you filthy rascal.

spice girls dancing2 – Put on dramatic, daring make up you would never normally wear and take a tonne of selfies looking fierce as fuck. Upload them to Instagram and revel in all the positive, yet pervy comments.

3 – Have a hot bath, shave your legs and smother yourself in a delicious body lotion and feel like a hot bish.

4 – Scroll through Facebook and look at pictures that made you cringe at the time because you were a drunk hot mess, but look at your smile and how genuinely happy you look because you’re drunk, having a good time and give zero fucks.

beyonce crying5 – Ask yourself, what would Beyonce do if she was sad and then do that thing.

6 – Masturbate whilst watching cartoon porn. It’s both horny and hilarious (so I’ve heard). Also, an orgasm releases endorphins that make you happy so go for several rounds if you want to be smiling until the cows come home.

7 – YouTube videos of kittens being cute.

8 – Find a Nigella recipe for something delicious, go to the shop, buy all the ingredients and make it. Of course, take pictures of your creation for validation on Facebook.

mermaid9 – Watch a Disney film. Bitches love Disney films. It has to be something really cheesy, like The Little Mermaid or Cinderella. Bish, you will go to the ball.

10 – Run down the stairs topless and hold your boobs to feel them jiggle and bounce about. Instant happiness.

11 – Watch Miles Jay’s videos.

12 – Do your nails, pluck your eyebrows, dye your hair etc. and other basic grooming. Just because you feel shitty you don’t need to look shit too.

13 – Buy shoes. The higher the heel the better you’ll feel and spend as much as you want – you’ll be returning them when you feel better.

cats working out14 – Do some exercise. Going to the gym would be your best bet but if you can’t face going outside do some squats, sit ups and lunges.

15 – Tidy up. Cleaning is a great distraction and a tidy home is a tidy mind.

16 – Take a nap or go to bed early. If need be, pop a sleeping pill… Everything is always better in the morning.

17 – Febreze your mattress and change your sheets. Fresh sheets are the best and no one can be sad snuggled up in clean, fresh sheets.

18 – Bake cupcakes. Because cupcakes.

cupcake

19 – Book tickets to something fabulous with someone you don’t see often. Lastminute offer a range of cheap tickets to comedy nights, give yourself something to look forward to.

kanye west20 – Call your mum and have a good cry, mum’s make everything better, it’s their job.

21 – Remember you are fucking awesome and sometimes it’s OK to be sad.

 

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